ur penis kinda felt like a vagina to me
she would only give me a road handjob because she didnt want to unbuckle
safety first
beeferoni + vodka = puke stuck in braces.
I'm thinking I had intended to send you pics cuz I woke up naked
Since he's sober and out of jail, he acts like we are the worst people on Earth. Fuck him, the only acceptable time in life to do coke is the early twenties. He won't take that from us.
I just want school to he over so we can build a big tent, do drugs inside it, and watch cartoons until the sun comes up.
That's all I've ever wanted.
There is a car windscreen wiper in my handbag... Not my car's, not ok.
Yeah I don't remember how I got home last night
Judging from my pants, I embarrassed myself smh
He's unconstrained by sanity, physics, or his liver.
its 3am and I'm taking a bubble bath, this is what taking a day off work at 30 looks like
i swear i was one second from getting his number and then the shrooms kicked in
Im drunk taking pregnancy tests with this really hot girl...i dont know what is happening
I watched one of the videos of you hanging from the rafters, and it is both violent and sexual in nature.
I'm sorry for peeing on you last night. Will cookies make up for it?
I once left mine in my bra and I forgot and I didn't notice it was there until it vibrated.
Randomize