It's like I'm the Little Bo Peep of sheparding dicks.
Only someone with your twisted mind could come up with that simile. Do you sit around and read 'How to turn Beloved Childrens Stories into Sexual Analogies?' This is the 3rd time you've done this.
I called the bar to ask if they found my Id and credit card and they remembered me as 'the girl who signed her receipt in blood'
I thought that since they were twins... they would be equally as good in bed
i wish we had morning classes together so we can spike our coffee.
Just saw two girls doing a walk of shame together. Slut bonding at it's best.
I'm pretty sure he's lost all respect for me. it probably happened somewhere around the time i had officially slept with every single one of his friends..
i've never been that scared in my life. i ran naked into the corner and he just stood there trying to shield his boner from the light.
My mom just told me the story of how she met my dad through prison. How was your saturday?
i don't know what body building stuff he's on, but his cum is basically a 5 hour energy shot.
Oh it's tea and biscuits for everyone. An possibly pink eye
We're doing a team debriefing of Saturday night in group text right now. As 75% of the female presence at that party we saw some shit.
Like if Ohio doesn't think I can get smashed on wine I will gladly prove them wrong
Tell me why i'm looking through my medical records and the last thing it said about my labor was 'vagina was explored'!?
I think I achieved my goal of being high for 24 hours in the same week I promised myself I wouldn't smoke anymore
I love you so much and not just because your dick is perfect
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