we ended up doing shots out of those medicine cups..swine flu finally did something good for me
we couldn't afford a big pool so we bought 2 kiddie pools and put the inflatable beer pong table inbetween. get over here. now.
She woke me up, whispered "I like the size of your dick", kissed me, and rolled over and went back to sleep
I am only moving my arms so I remember that I can. These brownies are wild.
the last thing i remember saying is "hope you like body hair"
I miss waking up knowing you're passed out under my bed.
No idea how he made them, but vodka water balloons were a horrible idea.
At what point does "I'm too high to deal with you right now" stop being rude?
I'm about to fuck a girl in an old school Tony Kukoc Bulls jersey. About to earn my third championship ring in sex
Can we just talk about how awesome I am. I just slept with a new guy while listening to the previous guys bands cd.
can we for just one second remember that I played with a homeless man's rat at st marks?
Well after the shots I danced with a homeless guy, split my toe on broken glass, and had a 20 piece mcnugget. Who says postgrad life is boring.
He texts me "what are you wearing" in the middle of the workday, so naturally I assume he's kidding and respond "the blood of my enemies" #foreveralone
I will run into the sunset with a fist full of condoms.
(440): please tell me you didn't have sex in my dress.. IT'S A VIRGIN DRESS.
Randomize
