ARI BLEW A 2.0 HAHAHAHAHAHHAHH THESE COPS ARE SO COOL!!!!
I just called a phone sex line and you know what I did? I sat there and cried
He was so confused why there was a string hanging out of my vagina.
he is training for a marathon but can't last more than five minutes on top. worst tuesday night ever
Dude how the fuck are we gonna get the lawnmower outta the pool?
At what point are you a chubby chaser or just desperate for sex?
maybe i'll make good life choices and keep my legs closed. periodically txt me friday and saturday night saying "baby carrot round 2" that should stop me.
you looked at her and told her she looks like the girl you lost your virginity to then told her you wanted to lose it to her again
some chick tossed a drink in your face at the bar last night. your mouth was opened so i think you ended up swallowing at least half of it. good job.
In a weird way, I don't want to stalk him on Facebook. I want to find out what's wrong with him the old-fashioned way. Is this what it means to be romantic?
Nothing like grinding all night with a hot ethnic guy dressed as a clown to help conquer your phobia. Halloween is fucked up.
I got my eyebrow ring humped out. How is that even possible?
did you just correct my grammar and then send me a photo of your dick?
There's no sexy way to moan the name Ernest. Or Ernie. This relationship is fucked
your fucking longboard fell on me while we were having sex you fucking hipster
Randomize
