im walking the streets of bville with a bag of cat food..looking for my car. i dont ever want to turn 21 again.
she made me take her to the grocery store to buy a gallon of sweet tea and a shit ton of band aids, the cashier asked if someone was hurt and she replied "not yet.."
He wants to make love to me in a sea of paint and wash my tears away with the brushes surrounding us..I've known him for 2 days.
josh has a chalupa in his pocket if you're hungry.
Also, ran into my neighbor across the street. He told me about scheduling his vasectomy. We are officially way beyond the acceptable point for asking his name again.
I made a list on my phone of places I want to fuck, it's right under my list of groceries I'm getting a little too used to regular sex but dude monogamy is the shit
We have 24 days left before I leave for college and 21 condoms left in the stockpile. Are you up for the challenge?
The worst part about getting "creative" and by that i mean baked is that i just wanna get laid right now and all im doing is eating nachos
Going to the beach. Greeting Sandy with a blunt. Wish us luck!
no joke- she just sprinkled parmesan cheese into her champagne and slurred "I just need a little snack"
On celebration of the Supreme Court ruling I feel it is our patriotic duty to have a threesome
Also not to brag but I got high last night and got us a host family in a chateau in the south of France
I'll do my best. he just keeps yelling beer and doing dick helicopters
Never drinking before a 6am train again. Just threw up at boarder control and had to pretend it was cause I was pregnant and not cause I trashed.
You make Europe seem so glamorous.
Only good thing about being an essential worker is that I have a letter allowing me to cross the bridge into jersey to get booze
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