Did you REALLY have to twitter about our sex last night?
no, he's only a walking dick if he mans up. right about now he's just a walking transgender.
My vag wants to play a game of hungry hungry hippos with your cock.
despite contrary belief, getting peanut butter off your balls is not as easy as it sounds
Do you think if I puke at the gym they think is because I'm going hard walking on the treadmill?
She kept biting his ear when he was talking to people, that was only 3 drinks in...
Or I could just give you a blow job and make it up to you.
No, that's okay. Don't worry about it.
Going once.....twice.........sold to the girl who didn't really wanna do it anyway.
someone to text and fuck? since when does that constitute a relationship?
since 2006
How do I enter a double puke and rally into my calorie counter?
so I am that guy with the red solo cup in class. someone has to step it up.
The silhouette of his dick looked like an eagle. Amurrican.
if my uterus stops caving in on itself long enough for me to be alive I'm there
have no fear, swaggie olivia is here to bring glorious gifts and horse dick to children
I answered the booty call in my Trophy Wife cutoff and my ex-boyfriends sweatpants with a bottle of jager.
and how was that received?
He just kept pissing on the couch as we were yelling at him while he repeatedly told us "its going to be okay".
Randomize
