Apparently I farted on her in my sleep. Then, just to be sure she was cool, I did it again on purpose and she didnt say anything. So, WIN?
Is it bad that everytime I read or hear "Woo Hoo" I immediately think of sex because of The Sims?
Well, I guess this was as good a night as any to find out I don't know how to use my fire extinguisher.
it was my 21st birthday. took an old mans walker so i could stay till last call. reasonable right?
noo you weren't that drunk. you just knocked the grill over and couldn't get the key in the door, so you climbed through the window. success.
His idea of a compliment is: 'you're cuter than your friend. If you both wanted a 3way I'd do it,but I'd pay more attention to you.'
he just voluntarily told me he was uncircumsized.. and that his favorite color was blue.
Finally considering to keep my landing strip before I have sex.. I feel like It makes me look mature.
This might be the most awkward night of my life. And I had someone pee on me once.
I just wanted to clarify that I am not bisexual and had no intentions of ACTUALLY penetrating my roommate with a can of bugspray.
I'm drunk and I have your birth certificate
I decided it might be a good time to stop when he requested I "bring that pussy over here"
So my ex vomited in front of my door and passed out there
I’m a women at a strip club dressed as post Malone
I woke up next to a Big Mac box.. And had no sheets or clothes on. The night was a success I think.
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