But i just feel like he will pull it out and ill panic. I mean its fairly basic. Up and down. But i feel like ill just freak out.
9 beers later and she still looks like Gary Busey.
Successful New Year's Eve:: Your first shower of the year is on Jan. 2nd... 'cause you didn't trust yourself to stand up long enough on Jan. 1st. Hello 2010.
I briefly wondered why they weren't in school, but after the tinier one shouted "check out dem titties!" I had my answer
I had sex on an exercise ball. The inevitable has occurred.
Dude, you need to come clean your dates vomit off the ceiling. What in the hell were you guys doing?!
i cannot be the only guy who has bought the every day with rachael ray magazine for use as porn
I'm at his house right now making him pancakes to compensate for YOU not giving him a handjob last night. You're welcome.
How's my date look?
Like a retarded elf
In a good way
I took a sleeping pill while he was in the bathroom. Time for a game of how long can we bang before I fall asleep.
You are both horrible and amazing
Well his dad is my dentist so they've both been in my mouth.
They are going to name an STD after you.
Today some guy at work told me I had the nicest hair he's ever seen and my response was "thanks I grew it myself". This is why I'm single.
It's a sad day when you're not really phased by the McChicken video only because you've seen weirder porn.
I was watchin a porno and I sware I saw that dude at the bar at applebees the other night
Randomize
