How is your vagina???
Double booked
With your butt?
Totes, candlesticks and all
Yay!!
a girl is trying to cook hot pockets in a saute pan on the stove.
He's Hawaiian. Thank god it wasnt a real American
how do I tell him nicely and in french that we can't have sex anymore because his huge penis will ruin me for other french men?
So... he formspringed me a link to every nude pic ive taken since he 8th grade. ive evolved nicely. but im nervous as to how this a website.
found inexpensive tickets to Norway. Questioning if its legal. PLEASE tell me you remebered the walkie talkies and face paint.
Whatever, the fact of the matter is that I saved you from poorly planned outdoor sex by doing a rain dance and you should totally thank me.
We passed my parents while I was giving him road head...that awkward
I think I just cured my dogs munchies
I mean he gave me an 'I owe you an orgasm' fist bump
The hair on my legs is officially flapping in the breeze when I walk. I must say, being single does have perks and this is one of them.
The fact that he quoted freebird as his breakup speech was a little more classy than expected
I've had your balls on my face a bunch of times so the least you could do is buy a girl some dinner.
We're so high we're eating flavored lube.
its official, you're fucking me on my lunch break. the only thing I want in my mouth is your dick. pick me up at noon.
want fries with that?
Randomize
