So, when he came he screamed MORTAL KOMBAT!!!! at the top of his lungs and all of his roomates yelled back FINISH HER!!!!.....yeah kinda akward
my step dad just called me a drunken slut..someone in my family finally understands me
I just banged two guys while dressed like an angel. I love this holiday.
Btw sorry for throwing that bag of ice at your face lastnight....
Everything smells like blood and olive oil.
I don't miss having sex with him. We had our finale fuck last week. He's all yours now.
You can see my drunken state get worse with each picture
you and him went to the park at 2am to "catch a pigeon" and ACTUALLY CAME BACK WITH A PIGEON
Every time you visit for the weekend I end up having to bleach my entire house after.
Dressing as mugato from zoolander Halloween you may want to be the hand model. We can get you a fish bowl filled with Clementine Vodka and soda you can put your hand in.
I will never look at a penis the same again. After that I will appreciate them so much more than I do. Makes me wanna kiss yours just for being pretty
BTW, Julia referred to you as a power bottom. Are you available?
i just got carded for condoms. wtf.....this is new. isnt safe sex a good thing?
You know. You being in a happy healthy relationship is REALLLYY cutting into our drinking alone together time.
you need to drop off my dinner before you go see him because i'm not gonna wait until you're finished fucking him to get my damn chinese food
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