Goodnight my chunky, little, marshmallow muncher
Where you are. You must stay where you are are
Where you are. You must stay where you are arewhere are youu
Where you are. You must stay where you 5eare wher are you!!
i don't remember her name, but i don't need it unless we decide to hook up again. but even then, i can get away with not knowing it for a while. it's not like we have actual conversations.
dude, osama threatened the US again
dude. i slept with your sister last night
what?
I saw that as an opertune moment to drop some big news
my cabbie only has one arm...this can't be safe
Apparently as she was dragging me out of the club, I was clinching onto this european guy screaming at Jenna: that's the 12th time you've cockblocked me tonight
My night consisted of weed, sex, and Mexican food. In that order. I think we found the keys to saving our marriage.
Me and the guy at the liquor store are on a first name basis, college is all about networking.
Yaaaayyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy! It has more than one y so my intentions to sleep with you after the drink special ends are clear
okay - we take $20 and buy each other some 'drink till we puke' clothes from the thrift store.
I remember looking at his body and thinking wow you have a body sculpted by Jesus himself. Still not sure if I said that out loud or not
Now that I'm sober, I'm realizing you put your name in my phone as "wowww"
I don't need inspirational quotes. If I'm going to be motivated, it will be by anger and spite.
On a scale of 1 to shit show you were "i just pissed myself"
well you're talking to a woman who had glorious sex less than 24 hrs ago so my opinion is biased.
Randomize