Damn. That makes sense
I know im like the sherlok holmes of sexual problems
I blew a .224 after sleeping for 6 hrs, cleary im a champion
She smells like mac and cheese, right after you add the cheese. It's strangely erotic.
His room was full of guns. It was like having sex with Clint Eastwood.
I just washed champagne and tuna off my body. I feel like that was a successful shower.
Still bad at ganbling. Still good at dringing.
The girl behind me in psych just tapped me on my shoulder to tell me there was a condom wrapper in my hood.
The same guy who pierced my nipples just told me he can help tutor me in precalc.
We shot off some fireworks at 12 and then I orchestrated the group singing of god bless the USA all while wearing a don't tread on me flag as a cape. I repped hard.
I am too drunk to be out in this weather around all these animals.
Eight drinks in. Subject is fondling chips before eating them. Intoxicated texting has expanded from best friend to random guy I met in FBLA.
the bandages come off on Tuesday. we can try out my new breasts then.
He carried around a bottle of jäger the whole night and when everyone thought the cops came, he started doing push ups in the middle of the floor cause he said it calmed him down.
Of course I fucked him. He's a professional beat boxer, his entire job is to do complicated shit with his tongue.
Ran up to the dollar store to get batteries for my vibrator. Happy Valentines Day!
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