My first STD was from a foam party
I got so high last night I started crying because i couldn't stop thinking about how scary space is
there was 12 of us, girls included, shirtless and wielding swords as we bet on rock paper scissors in the middle of the bar. It was like Cinco de Mayo version of the Deer Hunter
Actually, considering the facts that I am wearing a duct tape dress and eating a gas station quesadilla, I am pretty good.
All I know is that either you or I told a black guy that he looked like usher and he was sexy and that is our confession
Ive only seen a dude masterbate on a train twice, once on the Jtrain and once on the Ftrain... trust me you never wanna see where the subway turns around.
pooping with feet up on an ottoman about level with the toilet is nice
First roommate to find me and dance with me will live. Battle Royale.
i am willing to donate my body to this science experiment when it means free blowjobs
I'm going to CVS to meet the Craigslist guy who is going to buy my underwear. If I don't text you within the next hour, plz assume that I have been abducted by a stranger with an underwear fetish.
This girl just said she was late for class because she was having sex.
I have aggressive nipples.
I mean I've seen her tits but I don't know what her voice sounds like
I think I might start referring to your vagina as a separate being now
2 weeks into this dating someone with money thing and I already don't know if I can go back to the being poor life
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