Yes, one should always join a cult. At least once.
rubbing her clit was like playing thumb war
I love drunk self when he leaves a prepacked bong for the morning... in the bathroom.
youre not allowed to be friends with girls ive double teamed. period.
Staying in I think. Boyfriend has domesticated me. I'm making eggs naked right now. Also really high.
we're driving around with this really dirty (unclean and inappropriate) 60 year old ex-san quintin con named old skool d that my brother knows and hes bringing us to get weed. what is montana?
Come to wine Wednesday bro. We have a fog machine
You screamed "there will be blood" and punched some random guy in the face. So no, we can't go back to that bar.
He's gonna be like you slept with too many of my friends and you're being voted off the island haha
At first it will make you think "how is this physically possible?" and then it will ruin an entire food group for you.
It's the kind of dick you travel across the country for
Well I'm glad your Saturday night went a lot better than mine. I spent mine crying in a McDonald's parking lot.
I vomited out my contact lenses last night
Haha just talked to the dude you bit on Thursday. He has been growing a beard to hide the bruising....
the people in front of me have a grocery cart in their car... i missed college...
Randomize
