I just got hit in the face by an old lady love handle.
3 different guys in my psych class know me as 3 different names and said hi to me with all 3 different names-Andrea, Grace, and Bella
I've never been more proud of you
he took his pants off right in front of me then just stood there so i went for his boxers and he said he was waiting till marriage
A freshman just referred to Home Improvement as 'tim the tool man show'. People born after 1990 are not people.
Its like a 4.5 hour drive but there's drinking involved so I'm destined to go
I left myself a trail of jello shots, that ended at his door. OR maybe he left me a trail of jello shots at his door. DO I GO IN!?
Congratulations, your dick has been selected to participate in my birthday sex. Please reply with a response.
Do I have a choice?
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I look like one classy bitch running in heels through my backyard while carrying a small dog and a large bottle of booze. How am I still single?
Seems like you've kicked summer 2012 off well.
I'm getting the lip of my vagina pierced & you expect ME to be the voice of reason?
Sad Megan is Sad
Have you been drinking my beer?
CAN I WEAR ASSLESS CHAPS TO SUNDAY BRUNCH OF JUDGEMENT????
Woke up in bushes at UT didn't know I was Austin last night
So how do you explain to your boss that Siri called him mid sex?
You owe me a one night stand and a line. Possible an inflatable flamingo as well. And a caesar salad.
You know it's a good May 2-4 when it involves 14 straight hours of vodka slush and garlic bread
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