that's an acceptable place to lick
its like whenever the snow comes all the hott girls drop out of school. where are they
I just did the nutritional comparison between 2% milk and Bud Light Lime.. the beer had less calories, less carbs, and less fat. It's not looking good for milk in my life anymore
There's a transgender game of twister in the basement...God doesnt want me to type this paper.
I can't believe you just thanked me for a blowjob on my Facebook wall...
i love you. like a brother. a brother that i had sex with more than once.
You basically tried to anal probe my passed out friend with a lamp
She told me she's going to buy a projector so she can watch porn on her ceiling...I'm telling you man this chick is going places
We did it in the bathroom in Taco Bell. We didn't buy anything before we left, which I thought was rude.
I ran into my boss at the liquor store on our lunch hour we both just stood there awkwardly until i was like your car bar or mine hahaha we both need a cab
I finally got out of bed at 8:30pm and my little brother informed me that I had cereal stuck to my back. I'm going to smoke a cigarette and go back to sleep.
I may or may not have hooked up with the cop who arrested me.. Or I can cross hooking up with a stripper in a cop outfit off my bucket list.
She swallowed the key to the cuffs, I've been having to explain the pink fuzz all morning.
Showed up to the airport to find my fuck buddy is on the same flight. Do you think he'd be intertested in the mile high club?
I look like a hot mess, emphasis on the hot now, more emphasis on the mess later
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