And now his mom knows I was dipping my pen in company ink
Just applied online. Cant stop hiccupping. May be drunk. Hope they liked my smiley faces.
operation "beaches make me wet" is a go
we need blinds so i can safely watch porn during the day
I just woke up. In the port-o-potty next to our tailgate. an hour after the game started. explain.
i guess that's what happens when you find your girlfriend at the zoo
He managed to light the Jello on fire...
there is no excuse for him not showing up to my st. patrick's day party. i touch his dick. i get him on the high holidays.
Sometimes I wonder if my parents know that I mean horny when I say lonely.
That's the only definition of lonely that I know.
I told him I liked how shrimp feels in my mouth, but I don't actually like eating it. Turned out to be the most awkward way to say that I wanted to suck his dick.
We went to Denny's and he threatened to fight an entire high school track team by himself
sweet sixteen by hillary duff just came on and i feel like i let lizzie mcguire down for being such a stoner
he threw his shirt and suit jacket out the window of the uber going home
dude the last time we saw him was 2 nights ago when he was yelling that the trees were naked or some shit then he ran into the forest. I think its time for a search party
you know you're doing something right when your drug dealer insists on hugging you before you leave.
Randomize
