Soo i just shotgunned a water balloon...
what kind of vibe do I give off that a guy i've never hung out with thinks its okay to send me a picture of his ball cleavage?
Circus confirmed... Jello shots before 9 pm are not cocktails for sucess
I just spiked the applesauce. Try to tell me again your party is better.
He looked me straight in the eye when he was fingering me last night...it was very serial killer.
youre not allowed to be friends with girls ive double teamed. period.
Ask him about a girl named Meg then give a disappointed and disapproving face.
Ugh he's texting me.
Tell him you're no longer interested in what he has to offer; his shitty personality outweighs his sexual prowess.
I'm going to get pregnant and die... Mean Girls warned me about this but I didn't listen
Who would've thought that Monopoly night would've ended with some girl peeing on the couch.
You know it was a good night when you're lying on the couch in your pjs at 4pm having a pitcher of ice water for breakfast.
He kept asking for nudes so I sent him a picture another guys dick. He called me ruthless.
You guys had reggaeton music playing while dry humping? Definition of romance.
Vodka, rum, moonshine, I don't care, just bring like 5gallons.
You can say goodbye to our security deposit.
Already? What he do?
Opened a bag of topsoil at the party and spread it all over the living room. TOPSOIL!
Randomize
