okay serious question, the water is shut off in your house, do you attempt and use the clean toilet water for your new bong?
Maybe if you date her you can take a dump on her
I'm basically sure i was the reason for glitter on his penis
Don't take this the wrong way but I just mistook a trash can for you
he had his head down and said he was listening for the buffalo, he had to still be drunk.
I'm sorry that spending new years with you was fucking my boyfriend in your bathroom multiple times
Im playing the how drunk can i get before my card declines game. being single sucks. But getting drunk after work alone in fridays on a wenesday night sucks way more.
It's amazing to think about how many Obama victory sex babies are being prevented by Obamacare free contraception.
Everyone was trying to get you to do a keg stand but you refused & instead declared you could do it yourself, crouched on the keg in your 6 inch heels, leaned over, and gave yourself one.
I can't even express how horny I am. The English language isn't equipped for what I'm plotting.
Now in listening to Jerome Bettis speak at the hall of fame and my boner just started twirling a terrible towel
Sorry I called bc I needed help peeing outside
But I did it
I feel like that xmas present negates everything we were taught as little girls. Putting out DOES pay. God bless us everyone
Bro, I live in a constant state of existential dread and moderate ennui. The prospect of cosmic horror doesn’t faze me that much.
I've been on the cocaine and semen diet for the last 24 hours, lunch sounds great.
Randomize
