if he's not good at sex i should be allowed to have sex with someone who is. that's a totally legit statement i think
Please don't use social media to get back at me.
its like my vagina has this homing beacon out to all the guys saying "come find me, i havent been shaved in weeks"
An ad on my facebook says "don't be THAT girl". Its like it knows.
I just told my boyfriend I think I might be pregnant using Emoji icons....
which icon did you use to tell him he's not the father?
as soon as his mom opened the door to let me in the house she asked if i would like a shot
it's gonna be a great weekend
ONE NIGHT STAND. You have 27 minutes before the offer expires, so I suggest you hurry.
She came over and gave me a handy and then just lingered for a day and a half. Worst weekend ever.
Yea we had fun. Lost my wallet some girl has it. Sarah fell asleep in a cab and ended up at some wawa. It was cray. She's home now
Sitting in bed reading a porn novel off my phone and accidentally just made Siri start reading the most graphic part aloud. FUN FIRST NIGHT WITH THE NEW ROOMIE.
Great news. Our sex broke my otter box
I don't think "growing medical marijuana" is Quite what my Grandfather had in mind when he thought me about gardening as a child
my gyno just used the expression "dick around." too far?
You were so drunk, you kept telling everyone you had a platinum vagina.
I keep worrying she's gonna have a repeat of the time the ceiling fan was talking in Chinese
Randomize
