if she shaves her mustache, i'll let her give me head
He got me an interview at his law firm and his boss asked him what he had to say about me. His response "He dates CRAZY bitches."
I'm up to 9 pic of different guys. I need 4 more boys and each one of the 13 to submit 3 additional pics. I wanna make a penis deck of cards.
no more duck duck goose at the bar
No it's cool, He's been doing my English papers in exchange for lap dances since the eleventh grade. We're very professional.
No Robbie is the name of a kid or dog, not an adult man who's fucking you.
Cop came to our door looking for you. Something about sex in public and intoxication. I said you matched the description.
Yeah. It's just like I have his virginity and he has my shoes and where do we go from here.
Well, maybe we can talk about it over a drink and some crushed up vicodin.
We were all day drunk by 2pm. Now I know why they hate Americans
Don't send me nudes asking me to come fuck you on lunch break then send me a video of kids you're babysitting.
Yeah we invited her back for chicken nugget sandwiches
Are you drunk texting me again or are you just being your regular stupid self?
yes
She bruised my penis again. But, trooper I am we kept on going.
Have you ever gotten such awesome underwear you wish you didnt have to wear pants?
Randomize
