that thing about your dad's boner was meant to be a compliment
But I thought everyone had breakup sex?
eat the baked goods on the counter at your own risk... i made them while i was angry and drunk so they most likely have pubes in them
At what point in my life did a night that has strippers, belly dancers, tequila and a midget become "average"?
My boss walked in on me puking in the urinal while taking a piss. Sunday funday is eroding my last shred of credibility at work.
The bed I'm sleeping in has a headboard only handcuffs could love. I'm gonna pick up a local dude and wreck that.
First roommate to find me and dance with me will live. Battle Royale.
Or maybe I'll just keep introducing myself like, hello, they call me iane because I need the D. Applications are submitted online, women need not apply.
Awk moment when I forgot to tell my hookup about visitor parking so he got towed
At least his std test came back clean, gotta look at the positives here
did you just correct my grammar and then send me a photo of your dick?
I'm cooling my balls with a beer because I'm too cheap to turn on the AC
just found a picture from last night.
the one of you riding a horse with nothing but a bulletproof vest on?
uhm.... no?...
I called him the wrong name all night, yet I still got a ride home from the party and hooked up with the guy. I'm irresistible.
Dog. I woke up between my ex boyfriend witch i'm currently fucking and his bestfriend spooning me in MY bestfriends empty powerless house still really fucked up. No one knows what happend.
Randomize
