hipster in red sally jessy raphael glasses inside. kick her.
So today I found out that our school is known as the herpes school
All I'm saying is that she needs to invest in some razors. But her head game is great. The pros and cons in last minute hook-ups
There comes a time where you just have to sit back and watch the drunken idiots pee on each other
That's cool. At least the punch line of my story isn't I shit in a booth at Denny's.
would it be mean if I put better with the lights off on my sex playlist just for my hook up with him?
At first I was a little embarrassed for sharting, but then i realized it was a bachelor party, and I went balls to the wall
He took my virginity but also my remaining pizza. i dont know how to feel right now.
When you left the bar, you did two cartwheels and a heel click and RAN ALL THE WAY HOME.
We were right in the middle of sex and all of a sudden his kids toy story action figure starts talking "I think the word your searching for is Space Ranger." A literal Buzz kill. It was equally creepy and hilarious.
It's the kind of dick you travel across the country for
Stop recording sex noises and setting them as my ringtones. This time it was at a funeral
I just group texted a dick pic. Wonder who'll respond back first. Ashley Stacey or my stepmom
A guy I don't even know just ate me out on a washing machine at a random persons afterparty. I came as it was going through spin cycle.Just kept thinking "who does laundry during a party?"
Spent like 2 minutes so far learning and 35 minutes in a group chat talking about big asses. Yet another Wed zoom meeting.
Randomize
