Maybe she gives good head
A girl who still calls a dick a "wiener"cannot possibly give good head
It's always exciting to touch a new boob.
Cleveland boys shit in their own pumpkins in their own living room. Got pictures to prove it.
The bridesmaids just went smackdown on the floor, over the bouquet. I saw nipple. Best wedding ever
Its a bummer that corporate america doesn't believe in $2 u call its on a Sunday night
We had to leave the bar because you were trying to show the bartender your boobs for water.
I can't wait for you to see these terrible photos I'm about to have taken with some stripper looking girls. I don't know what this photographer is thinking
Seriously, it sounds like someone is torturing a dozen cats inside a Japanese techno club while a jamaican yells random hipster words through a megaphone.
Fucking her would be like seeing big foot, finding a four leaf clover , petting a unicorn, and arm wrestling a leprechaun in a matter of a 6 hour period
I planned on emotionally scarring him for life this weekend. DAMN YOU PERIOD!
painting my nails while super high-drunk. Ended up painting my entire hands. Both.
Well I passed out before 4:20 on 4/20 so I deem it a failure AND a success.
The tequila monkeys have a drum solo in my skull right now. I can't imagine Emily feels better.
This hangover is too legit right now. I just sneezed and almost puked
So...I'm pretty sure I have officially determined that reverse cowgirl is the only position possible to have sex in my smart four two
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