would you ever date a girl who drove an 89 Chrysler LeBaron? - for the record it's a convertable
hey I'm just gonna fall asleep in the bathroom at the library call me when you're done with class
All I wanna do is sit in water and get drunk. The only thing more American is giving birth to eagles.
stayed up to watch the sunrise..saw an albino taking shots on the quad..it's like there's a whole new world of people out there just waiting to meet us
I know I'm all grown up when I don't have to take my pregnancy test in the store bathroom anymore.
its was like we drinking an entire bottle of mystery
He had a beer bottle in each of his back pockets and was on rollerblades. All I remember is following him for about 10 minutes
Just pure bliss will emerge from Charles, my tranny bong.
Asking the homeless man what buss shelter is the warmest was not a good idea
What am I doing with my life
Sleeping with dudes who have peacocks apparently.
You guys had reggaeton music playing while dry humping? Definition of romance.
you got drunk, told him he looked like shaggy and said 'I wouldn't show you my mystery machine for all the scooby snacks in the world'
Getting blackout drunk infront of my family was never on my bucket list, but now that I've done it I'm cool with it.
I couldn't have possibly been that bad
You had her flip the penny over to the lucky side before you picked it up and ate it...
i’n just gonna forge ahead, gag reflex be DAMNED.
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