Well, for starters you dressed up in all Green and kept singing that song from "A Goofy Movie". Then you made us call you Powerline for the rest of the night...needless to say no, you didn't hook up with her
Totally about to meet up with Ryan in an empty parking lot. Expect to fuck him. Yes I know it's 3am. Slutty? Possibly. Excited? Damn right.
"Not only do I bring a guy back to my hotel room....But I bring one back for my friend who's passed out drunk. Now that's what we call BESTfriends"
my parents are out trying to convince the local liquor stores to post "do not sell our daughter alcohol" flyers. i'm preping my defense now.
Well that wasnt the exboyfriend i expected to hook up with today
Sorry, can't come over. I have to spend time with my niece. Her Dad ignores her and I don't want her to have male attention issues like you.
he had his head down and said he was listening for the buffalo, he had to still be drunk.
using the campers leftover pizza money at the bar. Definition of great counselors right here.
We're knee deep in HJ's right now.
I'm deep cleaning my room right now. Not sure if it actually needs it or if I'm just trying to symbolically cleanse myself of the last 24 hours.
I think I ripped my underwear last night doing drunk squats
He went down on me to the national anthem being sung by Jordan sparks. It was very patriotic of him
Dude 4th of July week was our like 5th anniversary of you sending me dick pics ❤️
i just cleaned my bong... I do not feel healthy
I need my comforter. Pls bring it to me and drape me in it like an animal pelt. Ps I'm naked.
Randomize
