Sponge bath it is.
the other night i did but this one wasnt and it was so random. i was hooking up with this boy who wanted to roleplay and pretend to be snakes
you kept screaming i cant feel my vagina, it kinda killed the mood.
I even resorted to pole dancing with the street sign. I have an extra $20 now because I think people were paying me to leave.
So someone hacked my email and facebook and posted a boob pic I took a few years ago as my profile picture. I feel like an MTV commercial.
Lowest moment of my life just occurred. I literally threw up all over myself in front of my parents.
Just seen a scantily clad pirate with 2 36 packs of natty ice on a bike riding with no hands. If she doesn't hit a speed bump she's golden and should be on the next Americas got talent.
We lived together for a year and neither of us knew we were both gay.
If I can't pick up a cat lady, I probably need to turn to Internet dating.
Is it bad that I feel proud to be the first one to puke in the apartment? And I did it in style?
You straight up painted the counter with steak, tequila and beer. You owe me a knew toothbrush.
My Wonder Woman lingerie has been defiled by man. I'm a horrible Amazon.
You don't understand. My ass is the color of eggplant.
I ask for a dick pic and he sends a picture of Dick Cheney. Who does that?
I want to be her friend more than I want to fuck her boyfriend.
thanks for not wanting to stay all night or talk or anything, nice to have a fuck buddy who really doesnt take the buddy part serious
I'm all about the fuck
Randomize
