I woke up on my floor...
I woke up with colors of the wind playing on repeat on my laptop...
I've never had a woman show me her venereal disease results in a bar before.
I trust that you have thought of something completely illegal for us to do this weekend.
We all told you to throw up but you just stuck your head in the toilet and screamed..
I can't believe they didnt cut us off after we all hugged each other and started singing "were the 3 best friends that anybody could have" RIGHT IN FRONT of the bar and bartender...
After what was supposed to be a one night stand I woke up to a message in my room wall written in marker "Kaitlin got it on in here" definitely a cock block down the road
I just got a huge discount at GameStop for having tits. I win.
There is no such thing as a great breathalizer story. That isn't a thing that exists.
I apparently made a "health and fitness" subcatagory called "drugs" on mint at some point. I used it to catagorize all of my nyc atm withdrawls for $60 haha
drinking vodka, listening 2 smh at 530am slow cooking beef stew. you'll enjoy the stew and worry abt me in the morning. bon apatite
I vote we get high and sneak off to McDonald's to get mcflurries.
YES. ALL MY YES.
And I'm sorry for punching you in the face when I drunkenly threw my sandwich
Pulling on my sock literally just took me 5 minutes.. The hangover is real
Sooooooo Your wife and your girlfriend are making cat noises at one another via text
I went out to dinner with the girls thinking I'd be home early. Instead I ended up in the Englishman's hotel room. Long Live The Queen.
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