Everytime we come here you have an ex here.
they could make at least 3 episode of "i shouldn't be alive" out of my weekend
I JUST WANT SOMEBODY TO EXPLAIN HOW FORESKIN WORKS AND DO NOT UNDERSTAND WHY THIS IS A PROBLEM.
his tattoo said carpe diem which i thought was ironic considering his epilepsy
we were hooking up and then he goes "you can touch my penis" and i laughed too hard to do anything. no second date.
A kid in my class today just asked if we have class on the 17th, then announced that he couldn't go anyways because it was the day after his 21 and he was going to be too hungover
She kept asking for cigarettes, than just put them in her purse as "savings"
GDI YOU HAVE THE GOD OF FUCKING THUNDER'S NUDES AND YOU DIDN'T SHARE
Wake up. Eat bread. Find your dignity. Don't be late for work again.
pretty sure I blew his mind with the sex last night. He repaid me with a five minute conversation about power rangers.
Whoever said it shouldn't take a man to make you happy clearly wasn't having sex everyday.
Mike fell asleep with his hand down my pants. I'm clearly an enticing person.
that guy was staring at your tits.
nah, more like they were staring at him, and his girlfriend, and her less than adequate bosom. they pitied the fool.
point taken, oh mistress of the bosoms.
What are you talking about? Keg stands at wedding are super classy.
Also I've decided to start stealing shot glasses after I do the shots. You in?
Randomize
