Dude i just saw JT leaving the hospital. He drove there to get fluids because he was too drunk, so they hooked him up to an IV so he didn't get alcohol poisoning. Did I mention he drove there? Oh yea and our roommates in the hospital with alcohol poisoning, she just puked up coal. So many ppl are here, it's like a hospital party, I love spring quarter!
no homo or anything but the way you were dancing with that girl gave me a boner
An eyelash just fell out into my container of rice. Searching for it, i took a single piece of rice out at a time coming to the coclusion that i should not be this high while eating rice.
Grandma was not a fan of the beer-can ornaments. Not "traditional".
What happened?....
He lifted up the blanket, and whispered "Don't do it" to his sperm....
All I remember is holding on to the elevator asking it politely to stop spinning
our conversations pretty much only consist of the phrase 'fuck you'. and the sex is fantastic. we've got a great thing going here.
Also, I don't remember opening my gifts from my family. It was cool when I woke up with a new ihome.
While I faked being asleep, he literally prayed to God out loud, asking for forgiveness for losing his virginity before marriage.
Just had a flashback of dry humping a man lying in the street while Jim (dressed as santa) screams 'HAVE YOU BEEN A GOOD BOY?!'
I blacked out after you got about 8 goldfish out of the tank and put them in your pockets. We're not allowed back. It was a sucky Walmart anyway...
Sarah is throwing up still and I'm eating salad with my fingers
Has anyone ever blacked out at an art show your dad brought you to?
Come eat Chinese buffet and watch us trip on acid. It'll be fun.
how did i manage to wake up with my bra on backwards?
Randomize
