That can be our thanksgiving, vodka and cornbread. Just like the pilgrims.
She was adopted and used to dance at Sapphire. just my speed.
We decided that the paper cups disintegrating was god's way of telling us we had had enough
that wasn't rum that I poured down your throat while you were sleeping
Emergency! LinkedIn connected me to a hotornot hookup from sophomore year... slutty phase sphere has officially invaded grown up professional sphere. My illusions of interweb sexual anonymity have been exploded.
I just peed in a flower pot on the veranda while crying and holding a drink
Go forth my little lesbian, get your gayme on
Really? A fat girl?
I'm walking her back. Chill out.
She is a nice girl okay. For some reason we are in my room though.
Happy Birhtday!
Dad, it's 3am and it's not my birthday... wherever you are, go home
Oh we were great hosts that night. We made sure to leave all the beds open by passing out on the bathroom floors instead.
Your dick is going to fall off. Be careful or you'll get callouses. A workingman's dick.
I woke up and there was pizza slices on the fucking walls of my room
I'm currently on a bowling date with my girlfriend and her boyfriend. It's pretty fun.
Is there any reason why a taxidermic donkey head is in the shower?
are you comparing glasses to pregnancy
Randomize
