Totally smoking with fifteen year olds.
This threesome is so guaranteed that dinner feels like a charade
he got up in front of the whole lecture hall and yelled that Charlie Brown's Christmas tree was his favorite book in the history of the universe. then he stumbled out the fire exit setting the alarm off. I could've jumped him right then and there.
These guys are walking up and down the hallway yelling, "Yo, is this the floor with the unisex bathroom?"
If for any reason you were wondering if i was going to vomit at the airport today, the answer is yes.
Ha ha. You should see the things I'm doing to my body at Bob Evans.
We learned a lot about one another. I showed him around the town I grew up in and he informed me that he has had a threesome and killed a cat
This should be a warning to men everywhere: do not send pictures of your erect penis to women you hardly know - they will add cats and send them to all of their friends.
I think the fact that I shit my pants, threw away my underwear in a frat bathroom, lost my socks down a drain in the front yard and still got laid... deserves some sort of a victory drink for myself or a blowjob for him since he was such a good sport.
I HAVE A GENTLEMANLY VAGINA.
Do drug dealers work on Memorial Day?
She said she is going to be sex-slave version of Princess Leia for halloween. You think there is any way I could pull off an attractive Jabba suit?
When you're done railing that chick, there is still half a pizza and some ninja turtle mac and cheese down here if you want
Give me 20 minutes.. I'm going to need to start off with an orgasm to get through this day
So her ex boyfriend came up a lot in conversation while I was fucking her. Is that weird?
Who the fuck has a conversation during sex?
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