I too understand the importance of cheesy bread
yeah seriously, fuck school. I'm changing my master's thesis question from "what are the neuropsychological correlates of antisocial personality" to "will my cat drink this beer"
i am high, trapped with a bunch of skaters and asians watching a cat on lsd on youtube, the girl on the couch next to me is getting fingered, and there is lady gaga playing. god has forgetten about me
Now we are really drunk and her 17 yr old cousin is shitfaced. He may or may not have proposed a toast to octopuses and double fisting. And we just drank to Mexico.
why is it ever time u get laid i end up having to clean something twice? you have no idea how hard it is to wash smugged ass cheeks off the counter
there not mine if that helps
The main two things I remember from last night is you "spanking Katey into reality" and watching her barf in terror.
Our funnel is on top of our neighbors roof.
currently pooping in a public restroom while drinking free beer. there has never been a finer line between awesome and depressing.
He was barking to the beat of "I like to fuck" and then chugged 3 beers and fell off the deck.. I should have gotten community service hours
I'm just trying my hardest not to get addicted to drugs or pregnant and all your other friends are out there getting married
We were banging then all I remember is coming down hard and smashing my top teeth off his forehead. I just rolled off and tapped out. Done-zo
My neck is PURPLE. This is NOT a good day to be indoctrinated by the cardinal...
Also, don't forget your plan to die young at a shrooms-fueled orgy.
Woo is fucking right, dude. Vodka night tonight. Honestly, every night pretty much seeems like vodka night lately. My liver wants to move out of my body like I gave it an eviction notice.
He fucked me so hard my contacts fell out! Didnt know that was possible.
Randomize
