This cougar at my work just said "big breasts" referring to poultry... Still resulted in a boner.
Is masturbating to pics of your ex on Facebook considered cheating?
You are proof that most things are best left unsaid.
It was all about her orgasm last night. I felt like a human dildo.
It's not weird mascara. I just have puke crusted on my eyelashes.
Is it weird that I want your dad to go down on me?
Its only.eleven and we are already chasing a man on a bike with a bag full of burger king
The dumpster is full of naked people swimming. I'm going to join.
I'm lowering my standards just so I can get laid, but I draw the line when a guy spells cool kewl
According to you, you were with your "Eskimo bro for life" last night.
this year we will have multiple halloween identities. lesbian couple meets brian and stewie
Was I asleep on the ride home?
Yea, then when I tried to hold your head up on a turn, you round house punched me in the face.
Mom and dad should be so proud half of their children have gotten naked in the same local grocery store
I sucked his dick by a creek, how romantic.
AND I NEED A VIKING FUNERAL OR MY GHOST ASS WILL SAUNTER ON OVER AND CASTRATE HIM FOR TECHNICALLY MURDERING ME
Its like my group of friends and I are all dating and we're all just a bunch of Swingers, is that normal?
Randomize