GUESS WHAT I JUST LICKED
I feel like half our conversations start this way.
I just egged your windshield and it froze on contact. Have fun with that.
One of my students just said I have "big mommy parts". Even third graders know that my tits are too big. God I love em.
his mom and i are swapping prescript pills..totally mother in law material.
Shit, I may have left some acid in your bathroom last night. Has he been in there lately.
This is stressing me out. I feel like I need to eat the dick.
Eric and I just went in the hallway to practice our new handshake in a real life situation at live speeds. That high.
Apparently I told a girl last night, that's she's super beautiful and I don't want to fuck she just deserves being eaten out
HOLD ONTO YOUR PANTIES AND SAY GOODBYE TO THE REMAINDER OF YOUR INTEGRITY
Dude I should have just gone home with the guy with dreads and the cat
That's the 2nd med student that has had his tongue in my butthole, what gives.
I don't know what that means. Any of it. BUT I will be at your house at 10:20 and you better be ready to get high as balls.
I don't want to inconvenience you with my dick\n\n
New life goal: Sex in a parking lot surrounded by a circle of fire.
You know how fear has a smell? Well turns out shame has a smell too. It's Pina colada flavored anal grease.
Randomize
