just fell over trying to sit on the toliet like a robot.
Just saw a man in a wheel chair using his feet to push himself backwards through a crosswalk... good morning Atlanta
haha you were so trashed that you deleted all of your christian music from itunes and kept saying"c-ya God, nice knowin ya"
i saw the poster for your lost tequila... what a shame
You kept me hostage in your driveway until you got your point across that alaska has warm weather
Only you could walk of shame to a childrens pirate themed birthday party
I think it's safe to say I'm rolling my hypothetical balls off
I was just hotboxing under my sheets and I got lost on the way out.
It was so scary.
This morning I woke up in the entrance of a retirement home. Memory fragments from last night: making it rain with the contents of my wallet over the bridge, getting hit by a car, and a lot of running.
What was my myspace song when I went away to rehab?
But can mardi gras accurately capture the essence of my tiny rage?
Is it a bad thing for a seven year old to call one an alcoholic? Asking for a friend..
This is either the best idea i've ever had or the worst. stay tuned.
Wish me luck on my new penis adventure
Have you ever thought, hey maybe the reason we were togather that long was because I was drunk the whole relationship?
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