I am not speculating about which disney princesses do and do not have gag reflexes
she has tattoo'd to her hips "grip here" this is why they made spring break
Just deleted any ex boyfriends and potential lovers from my phone in preparation for Vegas...
hey did i steal that bike before or after the ball dropped, casue i might have broken my resolution already
They really brought out their best strippers for vday weekend
As payment for all the times you have babysat me while im drunk, im giving you the shorts i stole from the guy i stayed with on friday night. They're clean. Come get em.
They knew I had a party because the refrigerator settings were different, but they don't notice that we installed a new toilet seat so it's okay.
more embarrassing than that time i showed up to class in my hoodie and leggings because i over slept, and then as i zipped my hoodie down i realized i didn't sleep with a bra on or a shirt
I looked so sad that Jessica gave me a bar of soap. So that's where I'm at.
We almost ended up sober because of u!!
You just sat there staring at your apple and saying "I'm so glad you're here" to it every time you took a bite.
It's not even 8:30a, wine glass is broken, there's sugar everywhere, and your mom just asked me what MILF means.
I woke up with a captain's hat on my desk.
It finally happened my mom knowingly gave me money to buy drugs i knew this day would come\n
you know you should be lucky to find the case to my dildo....that means no more random guys at the house!
Randomize
