I'm in a strip club that reminds me of a crack house from the 80's.
I just want to hang out with her.
You're a liar. Why do I have to give you reasons you can't have sex with my mom? I hate you.
i wish you could fill a pinata with booze
it always starts out as a suggestion then three hours later I have cum in my eye.
masturbating while the coffee brews is the new power nap
Yes I was being legit. That's the only plant I want in my house. A growing penis.
Some girl, somewhere, is going to wake up with my face paint on her vagina
It started out just like any other night: was watching a Zach Effron movie, drinking tequila out of a water bottle. I don't understand how this got out of hand.
ROOF CAVED IN, WE'RE GUNNA MAKE A WATERSLIDE
At first i thought she was a sexily dressed toddler. but not in a pedophile way, in a really on drugs way
Romney sounds like a middle school girl and that creepy ass smile makes me want to close my blinds
Spring Fling is on 420. The theme better be 'Flower Child'.
I want there to be fog machines and unicorns.
We could all 3 jump out of a cake in just tophats. A true marble cake.
Just set myself on fire a little bit. Made me think of you.
its weird getting into a political debate with a pony dressed as an anime character online
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