He is to the point where he forgot I was in the front seat of his car while he was taking me home...that stoned
I'm posted up in the bathroom at au bon pain, high as balls, experimenting with eyeshadow combinations and listening to 90s jlo. The girl in the stall next to me just plopped a big one and I laughed, hope I ruined her day
Hey.. Here's a thought for the evening. There's only two more sleeps until I fuck you so hard my back teeth will convulse.. Here's too Tuesday! Woohooooo
I have a test in the morning in sign language about signs for drugs and alcohol use. Im drunk and rolling a blunt. I've never felt so confident about a grade in my life.
You were on shrooms and "the trees are crazy green!" is all you could manage.
I just need to stop hanging out with girls who drink wine coolers.
I've been watching porn with my cat lately. No shame
We're sitting in the bathtub, eating pizza, doing shots of vvodka and comparing nipples. I havfe never been so comfortable in my life.
my mom said i came home and fell asleep on the floor. like right in front of her.
Dude I was walking down the street and threw up in a plastic cvs bag. Tequila wins again.
You cant use biscuit as a chaser
He told me he sees me like a sister then 10 mins later tried to make out with me.
He had a clap on lamp. So every time he was ramming into me, the lights kept turning on and off
I have never in my life been turned down for sex until this weekend.
Welcome to my everyday.
I remember waking up on the bathroom floor and seeing my teeth behind the toilet
Randomize
