well I can't set my house on fire every night
on a scale of 1-10how much freaking out is acceptable if you just found a (possibly used) cock ring in the head board that your parents gave you?
well when do great stories at the expense of people's relationships become a bad thing?
Banging bitches in a bar bathroom is not legit as it was in college, there are no fistpumps afterward only shame
I'm going to leave the fate of whether I go to my midterms up to my dealer hitting me up or not
Yehhhaaww I'm way ahead of you. I'm gunna get her a card that says " I'm sorry your now ex boyfriend decided to upgrade"
Maybe I'm a robot.
You can't be that drunk already
So. I need to gloat. I couldn't exactly tell my family that I won this game by deep throating.
Hey start looking around for a low rider Subaru. Well get a loan. It will be capital for our first music video.
Yeah I'm at the doctors getting a shotand don't know how to tell them I'm still probably drunk from last night
Dudes don't just lick butts of chicks they're not into.
Nobody wants to date "Eats Taco Bell Secretly In Her Car" Girl
UHG. i just want to have hot lesbian sex and eat pizza with you.
Tanner. All u drink. 10 bckaa. Locked in Porto potty outside. Constructed area. Main strrrreeeett. Fuck. Help. Pleese
It's next to that place that has cock fighting.
Randomize
