The night began with "let go home early so we can study for my 9am final" and ended with "show me your boobs for a free pack of gum".My breasts are worth 14 sticks for a dollar.
Dude, Erin Andrews has a nude video circulating the internet.
Is it any good?
Let me put it this way: I bet Stuart Scott's lazy eye went straight after watching that.
Threesomes are so awesome. You even have company on your walk of shame :)
You need to get here now. A drunk girl just stumbled into our apartment. shes laying on the floor by our door.
i am devastated. she was DTF and I was about to puke, i told her to wait outside my room for a second. Puked. Passed out woke up, she was gone. Found puke stains on my keyboard that seem to spell out youporn....
I had to go to the front counter of the restaurant and ask for the key because I was "pretty sure my friend is passed out in the bathroom right now"
Just finished my law exam. Questions 4-18 seemed to pertain specifically to things we've done this semester.
i'm sorry i gave your brother a handjob while you were on the blanket next to us, but to be fair your back was turned.
You look me right in the eyes and yelled "By the power of the superglue beer sword, I designate you my driver!" I almost felt honored.
I'm pretty sure I just discovered what the American Dream is said the person eating a hotdog for breakfast in bed in her underwear
You and the dog were competed for the water dish
Who knows. I'd probably only get a makeout with an OTPHJ from her so the return on sexual investment from her isn't looking that great.
You must have my penis confused with someone else's...which is disappointing
Do you ever look at someone's Snapchat story and think ‘you told me you would eat my ass’?
It feels so wrong having a picture of my tits next to a picture of my daughter.
Randomize
