sorry I missed your bday party.,I was vid chatting with that new guy I'm talking to all night...happy biirthday though
wicked high...have munchies. cherry flavor lube. problem solved.
she read insantiy as in-nast-tit-ty and asked what the hell does that mean...
He was going nice and slow, then he yelled " BOONNEESTOORRMM!!!!!". I can't walk straight.
I need someone to get my backpack from the bar before class tomorrow. I have to give my students their papers back.
First coke bust down the road. Spring is finally here.
Oh my god. I'm not ready to be an adult. I'm not ready.
While we were driving she just screams from the backseat: MUMFORD AND SONS DROP THE BANJO and made what were meant to be banjo sound effects
Although I feel like awkward kinda describes your entire sexual history...
Im rolling face in a pizzeria. I want to be with people who love me.
dude i'm so hungover my hair hurts
Also I just took Ritalin with coffee so if anyone wants to know what numbers sound like, I got you
You rolled onto your side and told me 'this is the recovery position'. That was after you were stoned. You've done this way too much.
The last thing I remember is talking to the firefighter next to me and he was giving me fruit.
She deleted me on Facebook. I think it's safe to say that she knows I fucked him now.
Randomize
