i need a penis for penetration, you wont do.
oh yeah... my b.
it feels like theres a golf ball between my legs. the sex was totally worth it tho.
I should have kept drinking, a coma can't be as bad as this hangover
It's summer and yet I still can't have one library session w/o seeing someone who has had their penis in me.
Even his old football coach jokes about how big it is. I don't want to be alone in a room with him and that monster.
Oh my god. My pre-date bowl for nerves tuned into "I'm too high for this date" he kept talking about trucks and I couldn't stop making racial slurs.
cashier rang me up and said, "white people are funny." like i'm NOT the only white person to buy just lettuce & 40 glow sticks
I was out with the drag queens until 7am. This is the hangover I needed to kick my ass back to sobriety. Dear Virgin Mary, fuck my life.
Please brint me miilk. I am on the floor but my door is open. Thank you, i appreciate u verry much.
While the bouncer was checking my purse, he found a bag of pasta noodles in it and asked me why I put them in my purse. I said to him: "So the guy knows I can cook."
This question may sound intrusive, but how did pushing out a baby affect your vagina?
If I die here, tell my vagina and my cats that I'm sorry.
Of course I'm watching space shows while stoned on the science channel. Why would I want to learn while not baked out of my skull?
the fact that I've been his fuck buddy for a year, and I'm pregnant isn't bothering me. the fact that he didn't tell me about his girlfriend does.
Adderall went through the wash. Took it anyway. Wish me luck.
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