question - sack: should she or should she not play with it during foreplay?
can't decide if i want to get drunk or coked for this harry potter thing.. it is kind of long
aren't you going with children?
Admittedly I was a little ambitious with some of the positions but you walked in during the worst of it.
As of this morning, vodka still has the other side of my BFF necklace. She treats me right.
no, didnt close...
What?! she made the first move and invited you back to her place. thats like striking out in t-ball pathetic...
you woulda been proud of me tonight though. i only made out with 2 guys. and in my defense one of them was to get a job after graduation.
we've coined the Sunday morning ritual of taking out our puke-filled trash cans as The Trash Of Shame
You called your ex's vag an "AIDS Pinata". Drunk You is the Hulk Hogan of insults.
I wish men found my impeccable aim when spitting into the sink attractive.
Omg yes! I just found a random muffin! Don't question it. Just praise the miracle.
My cousin is passed out in my room, so I just masturbated in my walk-in closet. Apparently I get off on danger. Make note of that.
I love you. Doing a double. Going to die. It will be painful. Let the world know i partied. God, did i party.
holy shit! you were walking down a hill and just happened to be passing a trash can like 4 ft away and projectile vomited over a fence into the trash can. kept walking and drank a beer.
You kept crying and I couldnt help but laugh at you, I was really high though.
i know were having a "heart to heart" right now, but does it make you feel uncomfortable that im sexting someone right now?
Randomize
