a guy named alex was hitting on my friend tonight. he doesnt work on wind turbines tho.
Black lace...the rest is up to ur imagination
Do you ever think God made girls unattractive around their periods as a warning?
I don't want to eat him, he probably tastes terrible.
bad decision saturdays are such a good decision
i have no feeling in my penis or fingers but i think it was worth it
I maybe just had sex outside in broad daylight. At a state park. Please be proud.
I would never do this in real life. It's only college.
when someone at the bar asked you a question all you knew how to say was "chug-a-lug"
How could I forget your birthday? I have an alarm in my phone to ask you for sex that day.
I was just asked if I wanted to struggle snuggle. She's a keeper
She was crying and pulled the collar of her shirt up to blot the tears. And then she just kept her head there. And stopped crying. "My boobs are just too amazing for me to cry." her words not mine please help she's still in that position
I was just in the bathroom and some guy yelled all hail the king... i cant go anywhere without getting recognized anymore.
I’ll call you in a minute. Trying to book an AirBnB so I can finally bang the yummy guy from yoga
Your downward dog is going to rock his cock. I’m jealous
It's 3 am. Nothing I've tried can get the taste of failure and vomit out of my mouth.
Randomize
