she definitely has that "I'll bang you, but then I'll tell your girlfriend" look to her.
I take back everything bad I said about that song party in the usa. There's just something about seeing a cross dresser lipsing it that makes a song sooo much better.
Just saved her as "new hostess that randy banged" ...I forgot her name
Precisely. She's an awesome drinking companion; yet, not so awesome mother-in-law material.
I put the condom across her upper lip. It was like a mustache of a job well done.
For Valentine's Day I've purchased six lighters and I'm decorating them for him. I'm on a full ride to an art school and this is what I'm using my talents for. An intervention is needed. Please stop letting me date stoners.
I mean it was like cry my eyes out or masturbate in my moms bathroom.
I think I've just evolved into some kind of vodka fueled monster
WHY IS HE GONE WHEN I ACTUALLY HAVE THE AMOUT OF ESTROGEN TO HUMP A SQUIRREL?!?!
Girls at BYU need to learn how to handle a penis. I swear my date last night was trying to pull it off my body to use later.
The oven caught fire. I put it out, but called the fire department just to make sure it was okay since the smoke wasn't going away
You just wanted to meet firemen
I still have to bake cookies and shave my legs so Mike can have MILF & cookies when he gets home.
Like I said, all hypothetical...unless, of course, you'd be into that. My heart may skip a beat.
Hey I’m obsessed with Charlie Heaton from stranger things...not because he got caught at the border with coke...okay that’s a lot of it
Man I can't believe I took a huge dump in a public garden
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