He told me he had never done that before...I responded with "clearly"
her roommate was in the bathroom for over an hour so i volunteered to take the dog out and i shit in the bushes
What. The. Fuck. No, you will not spank me.
That wasn't intended for you, my bad.
Who has a video camera? i want to look back on this one day and say OH thats why i spent 2 years in jail
Found a pic of me suckling your nipple at the bar. Safe to say you don't want this one tagged?
you're being stingy. if you didnt want people to have sex on your couch, you shouldve specifically said so.
Did you guys seriously let me trade my id for a kebab last night??
They were taking shots out of the caps of perfume bottles. This is too much for me.
Drink for every country you've never heard of.
Fuuuuuuuuuck
She's riding a bike down the street and drinking brown liquor. A pt cruiser is honking at her and she's like I HEAR YOU!!
He's basically me if I was an 8-yr-old boy. It's like looking into a pudgy terrifying mirror
I'm a sociology major remember
Well that and comm
Basically you majored in how to get laid
you and him went to the park at 2am to "catch a pigeon" and ACTUALLY CAME BACK WITH A PIGEON
Honestly, this is a first for me. I've always prided myself on my ability to pretend to get along with others.
Turns out my GF and my FWB have a mutual friend. Yada yada yada, I need to crash on your couch
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