we screwed to my bar mtzvah tape, I became a man while watching myself becom a man
so if i die before i go back to school its because the thing we found in the hallway that i've been smoking out of is a crack pipe
I don't care that you fucked her. I'm offended that once again, you fucked someone with me in the room because you assumed I was asleep.
He tried to write down the address for the cab on half a bagel.
Woke up laying in the kitchen floor with a cup in one hand and the beer tap in the other. Guess I just needed that one last beer.
Alosmot hir two of of mt mailanoxwa
Oh Jesus.
Laurln. I am dying. I am npt alive. Adderrall is not a real thing. Death is a rwal thing which I understandably
Omg.....I raised my camera to take a pic at this presentation, and I wanted to zoom in, so I swiped my phone to the left and up pops my dick pic from last night.
I can't bring myself to turn around to see if pple saw it.
Dude she broke four ribs, how does a 110 lb girl break four of my ribs during sex?! It hurts so bad but was so worth it
We got out of the car in valet drinking beers we gave the valet one as a tip
i took four shots of tequila, threw my fist up in the air, then went around the party showing everyone how to do the ninja turtle handshake. that's the last thing I remember
May the power of my ass compel you!!
Sex and compliments. The way to my heart
i like beer, sex, and cooking. what more can he want?
My fuck it list is complete! I finally got a firefighter!
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