k so who do I think I'm kidding applying to culinary school? I just fucked up a microwaveable pizza
its simple. when his lips are on my clitoris i want to marry him. when they are speaking i want to kill him.
Give me a heads up the next time you BBM me a voicenote of you cumming so I'll make sure not to play it while in the car with my parents. Miss you too.
Dudes got a Polo tattoo. I don't care if he has a yacht I can't handle that level of gay.
Leave it to him to get us kicked out of a bar for hitting on an 80 year old woman. I want to be that wasted one day.
It's confirmed I did eat a ping pong ball last night...
Everyone makes mistakes, yours just means you will forever be known as the chick that tried to steal a cheese plate from the funeral.
I seriously might throw up right now. In class. Sunglasses on. I'm getting too old for this.
i just peed with my friends in your backyard... do you still live here
Katie told the cabby "when the boat docks I'm getting off with you"
I tried snowmobiling at 2 am. I broke my glasses. You're right. Things do get out of control.
Naked. naked and bneed help.
well true... there's not a real discreet way to masturbate in public
How does it make you feel that I can't control my vagina around you?
I was in line at Panera when I got the pic you sent to your coworker. I just showed your vag to a soccer mom. The vibrator was a nice touch.
Randomize
