her fupa was seducing me. this is the last time i'm doing shrooms.
you made me watch la bamba, and then you yelled at me for disrespecting your mexican heritage.
How the hell can the Olympic committee frown so much on weed and yet put on a show you would have to be high to actually enjoy?
When he pulls out of you and farts and says ahh I wanted to do that for the past 30 mins ....you rethink the next drunken hook up
I think the moment I knew you were going to black out was when I told you how many shots you had already and you were shocked and then poured another one
Why are there jello shots in the kitchen drawer?
My gut feeling that we had reached a new level of intimacy last night was confirmed early this morning when you sleep farted on penis.
"He was so not worth staining my backseat for."
At the very least, I mastered a nap while occasionally being dry humped.
i just got hit on on the bus. Yes sir, because its every boys dream to fuck a forty year old with a face tattoo
Plus who wants to live somewhere tom jerked off? No one.
Thanks for the reference. If your boss hires me, I'll buy you a drink.
If my boss hires you, I'm going to need it.
Yeah. I fucked her boyfriend, she knows, and she still wants to keep dating him. That's love.
There is way too much butt cleavage here for a formal event.
I pointed at him and said “there goes mr fuckwad”
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